There’s so much info out there about ‘bad’ relationships. But what about what you SHOULD be looking for? Whether you’re in a relationship and want to analyse it a little, or if you’re looking for a new partner, understanding what makes a relationship good, solid, and likely to last can have a bit impact on your future happiness.
So here’s a list of some of the aspects that you should look for in a good relationship:
Honesty is vital in any relationship. Trust is the bond that holds the two of you together. I’s like a thin thread of silk – the strongest substance known to man, but once broken, can never really be mended fully.
Having a partner that you can truly trust is a wonderful thing. And being able to communicate honestly is crucial. Remember, this is a two-sided aspect of your relationship. You have to also provide them with the honesty and trust that you crave yourself.
OK, so while we’re not saying that couples have to communicate on absolutely every aspect of their lives (for example, if you work in completely different fields then you’re simply not going to have an in-depth understanding of the intricacies of each others work).
But the important thing is that you can be open with each other.
When something’s bothering you, you should both feel relaxed enough to bring it up. You shouldn’t feel the need to bottle things up – because bringing them out in the open is the healthiest way to ensure that the ‘issue’ doesn’t manifest into a ‘problem’.
Now, we all come with our personal hang-ups and baggage. But what you need in a good relationship is the ability to look past this, to have learned about yourself and taken action to become a better person. For a relationship to work, you need to be with someone who doesn’t dwell on past mistakes, but is prepared to look past them and evolve.
Doing things together in a relationship is something that you should enjoy. But also, it’s great for both of you to be independent. In other words, being happy as an individual and not having to be in a relationship to be happy.
So it’s OK that you like mountain climbing and your partner doesn’t. And it’s healthy if he or she wants to lose themselves in a book rather than watch that movie with you. As long as you do enough ‘stuff’ together, it’s truly healthy that both of you have individual interests too.
Sense of humor
Laughter really is the best medicine. And the two of you need to have a sense of humor that’s compatible. So if what they do makes you laugh, and vice versa, and you both find the same outside influences amusing, then you’re onto a winner.
Being with a partner who can empathise with your worries is a necessity. There’s going to be times when both of you struggle, and you need to be able to understand and respect what the other’s going through. Compassion is a big part of a relationship, and one of the pieces of glue that holds it together.
Respect for you. Respect for others. This is something that you absolutely should not compromise on within a relationship. Being shown respect by your partner is crucial for a relationship to be healthy and happy. It also encourages the links between the two of you to evolve and deepen, making the union even better.
And of course, it goes without saying that you should respect your partner back. Remember – relationships are not a one way street…
Of course, we can all be negative on occasion. But as long as your partner is basically positive, then you’re onto something good. The reason for this is that we’re all influenced by those around us. So if your partner is always looking on the negative, this will influence how you view life as well.
Naturally there will be times when one or the other in a relationship will be more negative than the other, and that’s when the other’s natural positivity will provide balance within the relationship.
As you can see, from this – and all the above – relationships are dynamic and all about the ‘team’. One person on their own cannot make a successful relationship – it’s all about how the two of you work together. And when it fits – it really fits! So enjoy if you’re there, and don’t stop looking if you’re not…